Alfred Hitchcock Presents: Special Delivery

I've been watching a lot of Alfred Hitchcock Presents episodes lately.  Like the Twilight Zone, the half hours are ideal for watching late at night just before sleeping.  And guessing the twist is actually an enjoyable as well as useful mental exercise.

Recently I watched the 1959 episode "Special  Delivery":



Bill and Cynthia, a Ward-and-June Cleaverish  suburban couple, get a special delivery package from  the mailman -- although it's actually for their preteen son Tommy. It's a packet of mushrooms from a company in the bayous of Louisiana, and soon Tommy is growing mushrooms in the family's basement --  indeed, it seems all the neighborhood kids are doing it.  Eventually it becomes clear that something very sinister is going on with these kids and their mushrooms, climaxing in a showdown between Bill and a no-longer-so Beaver Cleaverish Tommy.

Early on watching this episode, when neighbor Roger is telling Bill of his suspicions about the mushrooms, before I ever saw the credits, I began to get a deja vu feeling -- the overpoetic, unnatural dialogue was reminding me of The Martian Chronicles. Ray  Bradbury has a tendency toward that. Soon when the plot twist became clear I realized it was essentially a reworking of Bradbury's famous "Zero Hour", which had been dramatized several times on radio. You can hear one version here, from the classic series X Minus 1:  http://tinyurl.com/bksqnzd.  The ending of "Zero Hour" is one of old time radio's greatest moments, fully the equal of Sorry Wrong Number. "Special Delivery's" climax is very spooky -- "Zero Hour's" is blood-chillingly terrifying.

I watched the credits for "Special Delivery" and yes, Bradbury was there -- as the teleplay writer. There was no story credit. I wonder if the AHP brain trust of producer Norman Lloyd (who also directed) and executive producer Joan Harrison wanted to do "Zero  Hour" but couldn't get the rights, and had Bradbury provide this variation instead.

Viewers of Special Delivery will note the not- entirely-passing resemblance to Invasion Of The Body  Snatchers. As it happens Jack Finney's novel The Body Snatchers was published in 1955, while "Zero Hour" had appeared in Bradbury's collection The Illustrated  Man in 1951 (for those curious about John Wyndham's similarly-themed novel The Midwich Cuckoos -- filmed as Village Of The Damned -- it was published in 1957).

Portraying a child as villainous was not completely  unknown in films:  There was These Three (an  adaptation of Lillian Hellman's play The Children's Hour) in 1936, with a teenage girl maliciously spreading gossip, and the anti-Nazi propaganda piece Tomorrow The World in 1944, in which a German product of the Hitler Youth comes to live in prewar America and wreaks havoc on a nice upper- class household. But these were presented as freakish, isolated cases, a treatment also given to
the much later play and film of The Bad Seed in 1956. In "Zero Hour"/"Special Delivery" the villain is not simply a  child but CHILDREN themselves, as a group -- a fascinating twist in the era of Baby Booming, Dr. Spock, and 2.3 kids for every split-level ranch-style in the sparkling new suburban paradise.

The Black List Pay Site: One Writer's Experience Part 2

Follow up questions with Lauri Donohue, award-winning screenwriter, on her experience with the Black List pay site:

1. What was your initial cost for posting on the the Black List pay site and what did it buy? What have you spent since then?

$75 per script -- one month hosting plus one review. So far I've paid for a second month for two scripts.

2. What an "impression" and who counts as a "download"? How many have you received of each?

Impression = someone (writer or pro) looks at the project page for your script. This is where you have the logline, reviews, genres, etc.

Download = a pro downloads your script. Doesn't necessarily means they read it. ;)

For Whiplash I've gotten 442 impressions and 21 downloads.

3. Do you know who the downloaders were?  Did they contact you or your rep?

No and no.

4. Are you able to read scripts other writers have posted? Their loglines? Their stats?

No on scripts, yes on loglines. Can see their reviews and ratings (if they make them public) but not the number of downloads.

5. How does the BL newsletter work?

There's one on Friday that only goes to a subset of the pro members and only includes "component" scores for things like premise, dialogue, etc. There seem to be only 5 scripts (which vary from member to member based on their preferences ) on Friday. The newsletter on Monday is for scripts that get an 8/+ overall.

Thus, you can be in Friday but not in Monday. And I think you can be in Monday but not go to everyone on Friday.

6. Tell me about the other script you have posted?

My script "Herod" has gotten 111 impressions and 8 downloads, presumably due to people checking out Whiplash and wanting to see what else I had.

7. Is it true only the paid reviews,"count" for your number score? Are all reviews public? True that one high paid review is enough to land you in the newsletter?

No. All ratings count for the number score. Reviews are only public if you make them that way. (I already answered that last time.) Same for ratings. Yes, one review will put you in the newsletter, but it takes two ratings to put you on the top 15.

8. There were more success stories this week of writers being signed from the BL. How active are actual producers on the site?

The only "success stories" I've heard about are people getting signed with managers, and there have only been a handful of these that I know about. I have no idea how active producers are, and the BL has not shared this info.

9. Is it possible to have a long distance screenwriting career?m. So much seems to depend on networking, contacts, and sweepstakes pitching?

Ask someone who has one. :) The general consensus is no. What I have is more like a paying hobby. I made more money from screenwriting than half the WGA membership this year -- but half the WGA membership earns zero from screenwriting in a given year.

10. At what point would you exit the Black List site?

If I wasn't getting downloads at a rate that I thought justified the $25/month, or for whatever other reason I didn't think it was worthwhile. Or if the scripts all sold, of course. :)

Thanks, Lauri, for answering more questions!

Lauri's website:   www.themaccabeequeen.com

THE AXMAN OF NEW ORLEANS

 Another Q&A today.    This time with Chuck Hustmyre.   Chuck’s retired law enforcement who then began working as a journalist.   From there he wrote several non-fiction true crime books… then a novel… then a screenplay (HOUSE OF THE RISING SUN) which was produced last year.   His current project, THE AXMAN OF NEW ORLEANS, has been completed both as a novel and an adapted screenplay.

1.  Where did you first come across the story of the Axman of New Orleans?  Have there been any appearances in fiction prior to your novel?

CH:  I don't remember when I first heard of the axman. It seems he was always lurking there in the back of my mind. He has made a few appearances in books before, but other than a graphic novel, I think my book is the first one exclusively about the axman murders.

 2.  What research did you do on the story and where did you go?

CH:  I did a ton of research. I spent two solid weeks at the state library poring over microfilm copies of century old newspapers from New Orleans. I also spent time at the state archives. That is how I confirmed that Joseph Monfre was real and that he served time at Angola for dynamiting a grocery store. Then to confirm the shooting in Los Angeles in 1921, I had to search the archives of the L.A. Times. I have a giant file on the axman killings.

 3.  The story began as a novel and you've adapted it to a screenplay.  What were the challenges facing you in doing the adaptation?

CH:  The biggest challenge was how to present a series of murders that spanned nearly a decade in a condensed timeline and have it all fit into 120 pages.

 4.  You began news and feature reporting.  Then true crime non-fiction.  Then fiction.  How did the journalistic approach affect your fiction style?

CH:  I think the best training I had for screenwriting was being a journalist. Writing news articles teaches you how to write fast and tight. The lead in an article has to grab the reader's attention, just like the first images or scene in a screenplay. I don't think it is a coincidence that many top novelists began their careers as reporters. As an aside, now that the newspaper business is dying and the book business is in such turmoil, I think you will see more former reporters try their hand at screenwriting.
 
5. Are any characters in Axman composite characters or did all these folks exist?

CH:  I created the two man characters, Detective Colin Fitzgerald and reporter Emile Denoux. Almost all of the other characters are historical figures. I did change the names of one or two to protect the sensibilities of their real descendants. But the more disreputable figures from history, I left intact since I could not possibly damage their reputations anymore than they had already done themselves.

 6.  Which is more difficult to write: Screenplay or novel?   And why?

CH:  A novel is more difficult to write, mainly because novels are so long. A screenplay is about 18,000 words, whereas a novel is about 100,000. It takes a year to write a novel. But that doesn't mean that screenplays are easy. To tell a complete tale in 18,000 words is often quite a challenge. Novels give the author the space to do some meandering. Screenplays don't. A good script has to be tighter than Dick's hatband. As lean as a triathlete. There is just no room for fluff. Anything extraneous has to be excised.

 7.  How committed we're you to track the historical events?  This the "based on" or the "inspired by" true events version?

CH:  I kept everything real that I could. All of the murders are real. I tinkered with the timeline some, and I changed a few of the circumstances, but the basic story of the murders is quite real. What I created was the ending, but even that is based on the true story. If I had to put a number to it, I would say that my version is about 75% true to the facts.

 8. Is it possible for a writer to get "lost in research"?   How much time was put In prior to writing?    Did you consider doing it as True Crime?

CH:  I originally intended to write AXMAN as a nonfiction book. The problem was that there was just not enough of a historical record to write a complete book. Added to that, whatever official records existed were probably destroyed by Hurricane Katrina, since I know from personal experience that in New Orleans the clerk of court's archives were in the basement of the courthouse, which flooded during the storm. Still, while working on the novel I did an enormous amount of research. The biggest difference between the Axman research and the research I did for my two true crime books was that with the Axman case, there was no one to interview. The case is a hundred years old and everyone with direct knowledge of it is dead. That is why I went the fiction route. I wanted to tell the entire story, but for dramatic effect I needed to fill in the gaps in the history. And yes, writers can get "lost in research" and never actually start writing. Research continues through the writing, but once I have enough to understand the story, I start writing.

 9.  How did your background in law enforcement come into play telling the Axman story?

CH:  My law enforcement experience helped me understand the real story and tell it in a way that is true to life. Most writers don't know a gun from a gumshoe, and their writing shows it. I can't tell you how many times I have seen ridiculous police situations on screen or read them in books. I try to create circumstances that could actually happen. My characters are real people in extraordinary situations. They're not supermen or superwomen. No one dodges bullets.

 10.  New Orleans as a setting.  The unique race and culture juxtapositions in the story remind the reader how unique the city is.  How did the setting enhance your story?

CH:  I think New Orleans is part of the story. The city is another character. The culture, the ethnicity, the rampant corruption -- all play a part in the story.

 11.  You've been successful in getting five books into print and one film produced from your novel.  What's the future for Axman?   Advice to the fiction writer on landing an agent or first deal.  

CH:  The AXMAN novel was briefly on the Amazon bestseller list, but without a marketing campaign behind it, it remains a rather obscure novel, just like the Axman case itself. The Axman is America's Jack the Ripper, yet most people in New Orleans -- even most cops I've asked -- have not heard of the case. I'm hoping that as the book slowly picks up sales and as my manager shops the screenplay, the story can finally reach a wide audience. As far as getting your first deal, that's on the writer. No L.A. agent is going to even consider a screenwriter without a production credit. When I was a cop, I used to be the ram guy, the one who battered down the door while we executed search warrants. I take that same approach to selling my writing. If I come across a locked door, I break it down.

 12.  Your favorite scene from the book?

CH:  From the book and the script, I like scene in which Colin and Emile are riding around in Emile's boss's Ford Model T looking for the Axman on the fog-shrouded streets and they find him.

 13.  Other projects you have in the works.  Do you have another untold New Orleans story?

CH:  I have several scripts under option, but the one I'm most excited to see come to the screen is my contemporary JFK conspiracy thriller, THE ASSASSIN. I was born the day JFK was shot, about two hours after the assassination, so I have always been fascinated with the case. And it also has ties to New Orleans.

More interviews to come.   Thanks for reading.  /STH

CHUCK HUSTMYRE wrote the script for the 2011 Lionsgate movie "House of the Rising Sun," and the upcoming Lionsgate movie "End of the Gun." He is also the bestselling author of the books "Killer with a Badge," "A Killer Like Me," and "Unspeakable Violence." He can be reached at www.chuckhustmyre.com.

The Black List Pay Site: One Writer's Experience

Franklin Leonard was a development exec who one afternoon had a brilliant idea: Let me poll the various development execs around town I know about the best unproduced screenplays they'd read that year and compile the information.   Using the name "Black List" as both an homage to those who suffered after the House on Un-American Activities acted fairly Un-American toward writers with leftist political views or associations and a commentary on 'black' as the default word carrying negative connotations (remember the scene in MALCOLM X with the diciontary?), the list went out to those who participated and that was that.   But it wasn't.

The Black List circulated all over town and became an annual event.   Writers wanted to make the list.  Agents and managers wanted their clients on it.   Production companies had their readers cover every script that made the list.   Trades began following the results and publishing the 'winners.'  Films were made.   Careers were born.   Several years went by.

Enter Black List 2.0.   http://blcklst.com/

What if ANY writer had a shot to make the Black List?   How?   Upload your script.   $25 a month and it's part of the database.   Pay $50 for one review (or $50 more per additional) and a pro coverage score will be attached to the project.   This will allow producers, agents, managers to find that undiscovered gem.  

Great idea?   Yes.  There are 6,000+ scripts already uploaded.

One participant in the BL 2.0 is Lauri Donohue.   Her screenplay WHIPLASH is posted on the site.  It received an initial score of 9.5/10 (amazing; top 1%) and has fluctuated a bit since then.   Each professional that reads and scores posts a number rating and the rating/ranking changes with the new scoring.   Nevertheless, she's hung near the top and gotten downloads. 

Lauri lives in Israel (one of her questions was recently featured on the great John August/Craig Mazin podcast) so she's not able to knock on doors and network in Los Angeles except online.   She was selected a year or so ago to do a rewrite for an Amazon Studios project (ZOMBIES VS. GLADIATORS).

Here's my Q&A with her about the Black List site.   Many potential customers likely have these or similar questions.   I welcome further discussion in the COMMENTS.

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1. Did you pay for one, two, or three initial reviews?

Paid for one review for each script. I posted two scripts initially, then two more after I got the 9. All other ratings were free from "pro" members of the community. (These pro ratings don't come with reviews.)

2. Are the reviews posted with the script publicly?

The writer can decide whether or not to make reviews and ratings public. You can decide on a case-by-case basis for the paid reviews. For the ratings, you either make public the average or you don't. You can still get on the top 15 without making the average public.

3. What is the minimum number of months you must post your script?

One, or a fraction. You can take it down at any time. You need to pay for one month ($25) regardless.

4. Any way to ax the reviews if you don't like them?

You can chose not to make them public. If something is REALLY off (for example, the initial review of Herod described it as a comedy and complained it didn't have enough jokes) Franklin is responsive; in my case, he apologized, took the review down, and offered me both a free additional review and a free month of hosting.

5. Are reviews taken down once script removed?

I assume so, since they're linked to the script. I don't see any way they could keep them up.

6. You're getting reads. Do you know which prod co read the script?

No way to tell. And it's not just prodcos -- I think it's mostly reps and assistants. (This is not to diss assistants -- they're very important and can spot good scripts and get them to their bosses.)

7. If yes to 6, are you allowed to follow up off the site?

n/a

8. Have you gotten any "we can't make this but we like the writing / what else ya got?" requests?

No requests, contacts at all. But 2 of the other scripts have also gotten downloads. Don't know whether this is because the 9 for WL caused people to look at what else I had posted.

9. How much financially should a writer be prepared to invest in each BL posting? Looks like $75 is minimum. If you want multiple reviews and a couple a months, it's $200 per script.

Yes, $75 minimum. I don't see any point of just paying the $25 hosting fee without the review because the odds are the script won't get noticed. And if you don't get an 8 or up, I'm not sure it's worth keeping a script up there. (Unless you also have a higher-rated script up that could generate "referrals.")

10. Have you used the high rating to send out queries for your other scripts?

Not queries per se, but did send an email to several dozen industry contacts. Got a few nice emails back, once of which led to a call from a top-3 agency asking to read my newest thriller (not on the BL).

11. Are you allowed to post portions of the positive reviews to query other scripts, managers, agents, prod cos off site?

There's nothing to prohibit this and I don't see how they'd stop you. In fact, I'd assume they'd encourage it since it draws attention to the BL.

12. Have you done any rewriting based on the notes you received?

no. the notes aren't very detailed, and I'm pretty happy with the script as-is.

13. Big risk (obviously was worth it for you) in publicly posted a script and coverage on a site like Black List. Might be a shortcut for a prod co to rely on the coverage posted there than giving a unique review. The reviews may be there forever, even if you've updated the script. It may be the take of only one or two readers that determines the fate of your script. How did you weigh these risks prior to submission?

They aren't there forever, and you can decide whether or not to make them public. No risk at all.

14. It would seem scripts with no current play (older script; script that hasn't attracted commercial attention) but is a good writing sample would be the ideal submission. Thoughts?

It's too early to say what, if anything, the BL is good for. I wish Franklin would post success stories/stats so we had more than vague anecdotal evidence of what's happening. I've heard of one person getting some meetings, one person getting a manager, but that's about it.

One thing to make VERY clear -- some people on Done Deal were talking like that 9 meant that I was on the brink of a sale. Even the person I talked to from the agency thought I must be getting a lot of calls.

But I haven't gotten any calls, emails, etc. after 12 days, 306 impressions, and 16 downloads. This could be because of the kind of people on the BL, it could be because of the script, or it could be because of "how the industry works" or something else. No way to tell.

Maybe something will happen for me with the BL and maybe it won't, but a good rating on the BL certainly isn't a guarantee of anything. It's just another lottery ticket -- not an EZ Pass. ;)

It's hard to sell stuff, period. The BL seems like a good idea and it might help. Or it might not. The jury is still out.

If you want to know about the  success stories, there's a thread here:

http://messageboard.donedealpro.com/boards/showthread.php?t=70295

(Here is the review from BL for her screenplay WHIPLASH.    This is typical of the coverage for the Black List site but the score (a 9) is in the top 2%.   I post this not as a promo but so you get an idea of the coverage.   As you can see, it’s more brief summary notes rather than an in-depth analysis.   Those seeking full notes should vet their project elsewhere.)

This is for Whiplash:

Era: 1860's

Locations: New Hampshire; Boston, Massachusetts; Savannah, Georgia; Kansas; Iowa; San Francisco, California

Budget: Blockbuster

Genre: Action & Adventure, Romantic Adventure, Western

Pages: 118

Logline:
In the 1860’s, a teenage girl is orphaned when a heartless Northern General kills her brother during the Civil War. Given her talent with horses she masquerades as a boy and takes up stagecoach driving in order to track down the Northern General and avenge her brother’s death.

Strengths:
Charlie is an exciting heroine and watching her make her own success in such a difficult time is inspiring. Her developing relationship with Frank adds comedic sexual tension as she tries to appear tough despite her obvious interest in him. The historical aspects of this script are seamlessly incorporated and seem quite accurate. Additionally, the script is wonderfully paced with just the right combination of romance and adventure.

Weaknesses:
Charlie’s move from Boston to Iowa is kind of sudden and lacks a clear motivation. Directly prior to the move the stable hands teased her, but her earlier desire to move toward California is more likely the motivator. Connecting her decision to leave with her goal of reaching California could better signal the moment as the start of her journey.

Prospects
“Whiplash” is an exhilarating romantic adventure with original characters and important historical significance. If produced this story could find success across all four quadrants but especially with women given such a strong female heroine as the lead character.

Thanks for the Q&A, Lauri.  Wish you the best of luck with the BL and your writing career!

Lauri’s Bio and Website:

SCREENWRITING

v Eight feature scripts
v Two short scripts
v Three rewrite assignments
v Winner, More Magazine/Women in Film Screenplay Award
v Winner, Amazon Studios Script Spotlight Award
v Silver Prize, Page International Screenplay Competition
v Finalist, Harvardwood Screenplay Competition
v Semi-finalist (four times) and top-30 (twice), Nicholl Fellowship Competition
v Profiled in Script Magazine

PLAYWRITING

v Winner, Dorothy Silver Playwriting Award
v Published by Baker’s Plays
v Work performed in the US, Canada, and Israel

EDUCATION

v Studied writing, film, and theater at Harvard, UCLA, RADA, and the Vancouver Film School

www.themaccabeequeen.com

Update on Comedy Writing eBook

Getting good reactions thus far.  Could use some more reviews for my eBook.  

http://www.amazon.com/The-Jokes-On-You-ebook/dp/B0088EWD1O

Kindle software is available free for ANY computer / iPad / etc.  

The book goes into depth on comedy (history, theory, joke construction, sketches, etc. etc.)  

Give it a look!

Robert Altman's TV Beginnings

After spending years producing industrial films in Kansas City, but before becoming an auteurist's darling, Robert Altman worked as an assembly line director in episodic TV. Most of this work was routine, but a few entries stand out from the pack.

COMBAT: "Survival" (1963)



TV greatest war drama (after Band of Brothers), created by war specialist Robert Pirosh (Battleground, Hell Is for Heroes -- curiously enough, he was a former writer for the Marx Brothers), and concerning a squad of GIs in France just after D-Day.  This episode shows the dogfaces captured by Germans and held captive in a barn -- but the barn catches fire, and the resulting confusion separates an injured Sgt. Saunders (Vic Morrow) from his unit. For the rest of footage attention is divided between the squad escaping and Saunders wandering around in a daze. The Morrow section has almost no dialogue, as well as some unorthodox camera angles for the period. Even today "Survival" is impressively out-of-the-ordinary TV.


KRAFT SUSPENSE THEATRE: "Once Upon A Savage Night" (1964)



A pilot for a cop show starring veteran tough guy Charles McGraw.  Notable not only for Altman's moody direction merging noir with verite, but also for actually shooting on Chicago locations -- a very, very rare occurrence in those days, as Mayor Daley hated The Untouchables and blamed it for damaging the city's image. Daley would take out his frustrations on Hollywood, refusing to cooperate with filmmakers who wanted to shoot there (how did residents feel about him costing the city money?). How Altman was able to finagle the location shoot, not only with the Chitown bigwigs but Universal and his producer (Perry Como!), I have no idea.

Note the score by John Williams.   Opening very much influenced by Bernard Hermann.

An offering from Altman's Kansas City oeuvre:



Altman himself has a cameo at 4:20 -- he's a lot more emotional here than he ever was in his TV interviews.

The Emmy Foundation

The Emmy Foundation has created a website called the Archive of American Television.  The archive contains a great series of interviews with actors, writers, and producers from classic television.

One of my favorites from the site is an interview with James L. Brooks.  Below he discusses the creation of the MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW.





The rest of the interview can be found here:

http://www.emmytvlegends.org/interviews/people/james-l-brooks


Carl Reiner is interviewed here:

http://www.emmytvlegends.org/interviews/people/carl-reiner


These are 8-12 part interviews.   They go into detail.   All must watches!

More information on the Archive:

http://www.emmytvlegends.org/about-the-archive